Just What I Needed
I have heard it said that you can find God anywhere if you just look. People have seen Him in the clouds, in the water, in shadows on buildings... Well, I saw Him this weekend in a most unlikely and unexpected place. But He was right where I needed Him to be.
This OCS weekend I served as Class Leader. It is really intimidating to be in front of the whole class and have to report to the cadre, and to know that you are responsible for everything that goes on. Friday night we started off with testing. I felt pretty good about the written tests, and ended up with a 91 and a 94 on them. The performance tests were harder. I passed the command voice test with no difficulty, but got nervous on the individual drill movements. My about-face came up a little short and I got a NO-GO. Only two people in the class passed, and the rest of us would retest on Saturday evening. My roommate and I began to settle in for bed, when I discovered, to my horror, that I had left my running shoes at home! The Class Leader can't very well report to PT in desert boots! It was 10 PM, and Jill was not about to let me go out by myself. Well, there is a Wal-Mart on the other side of the exit! We'll go there!
Wrong.
The Wal-Mart closed at 10 PM. We drove across the street where I'd seen a CVS sign. It was closed as well. The manager of the grocery store next door was collecting grocery carts in the parking lot, so we pulled up and asked him where we might find shoes at this hour. He directed us to another Wal-Mart. This one was a little over 20 miles away! Off we went, finally returning with the shoes. Boy I sure am glad I looked for them before morning! I would have been up the creek!!!
We began to learn company drill, which is almost like dance class. Getting 17 people to do a move that resembles a "Chinese Fire Drill" without crashing into each other is a feat in itself. I had a tough time with that one. I don't know if they weren't leaving me a spot to go into or if I wasn't in the right place, but it was a mess. I got really disgusted with myself. By the time we lined up outside the chow hall for lunch I felt like an idiot. They had set up a sandwich bar, and I was glad to see peanut butter and jelly. The peanut butter was crunchy, but it still looked pretty good. I sat down to eat, which we had to do in silence. This gave me way too much time to just think about how things had gone. I was getting madder and madder and I could feel my face getting hot. My eyes threatened to water, and I did not want to cry in front of everyone. This really made me feel stupid. So I did what I usually do when I have a problem. I prayed.
Lord, I need your help. I'm in the spotlight here, and have a lot of people looking for me to succeed. Please help me and all the class to pass the retest. Please take away my anger and my fear. Be with me, calm me down, and help me get through this.
As I continued to nibble at my lunch I continued to pray in my head. I looked down at the half-eaten sandwich, and suddenly pushed the center in toward me. The bread, crunchy peanut butter, and strawberry jelly became a friendly smile. I smiled in spite of myself and thought, "Boy I have really lost it now! My sandwich and I are grinning at each other! I'll probably be the first Section 8 discharge the GSDF has had to process!"
My moment of ridiculousness passed, and I went back to classes. I passed the retest and didn't stress over it so much. I received compliments from the class and the cadre about the job I was doing. When I got into bed Saturday night, I felt it had been a good day afterall.
Can you find God if you know where to look, and does He hear your prayers? You bet He does. He sent me a smile, and it was just what I needed!!!
This OCS weekend I served as Class Leader. It is really intimidating to be in front of the whole class and have to report to the cadre, and to know that you are responsible for everything that goes on. Friday night we started off with testing. I felt pretty good about the written tests, and ended up with a 91 and a 94 on them. The performance tests were harder. I passed the command voice test with no difficulty, but got nervous on the individual drill movements. My about-face came up a little short and I got a NO-GO. Only two people in the class passed, and the rest of us would retest on Saturday evening. My roommate and I began to settle in for bed, when I discovered, to my horror, that I had left my running shoes at home! The Class Leader can't very well report to PT in desert boots! It was 10 PM, and Jill was not about to let me go out by myself. Well, there is a Wal-Mart on the other side of the exit! We'll go there!
Wrong.
The Wal-Mart closed at 10 PM. We drove across the street where I'd seen a CVS sign. It was closed as well. The manager of the grocery store next door was collecting grocery carts in the parking lot, so we pulled up and asked him where we might find shoes at this hour. He directed us to another Wal-Mart. This one was a little over 20 miles away! Off we went, finally returning with the shoes. Boy I sure am glad I looked for them before morning! I would have been up the creek!!!
We began to learn company drill, which is almost like dance class. Getting 17 people to do a move that resembles a "Chinese Fire Drill" without crashing into each other is a feat in itself. I had a tough time with that one. I don't know if they weren't leaving me a spot to go into or if I wasn't in the right place, but it was a mess. I got really disgusted with myself. By the time we lined up outside the chow hall for lunch I felt like an idiot. They had set up a sandwich bar, and I was glad to see peanut butter and jelly. The peanut butter was crunchy, but it still looked pretty good. I sat down to eat, which we had to do in silence. This gave me way too much time to just think about how things had gone. I was getting madder and madder and I could feel my face getting hot. My eyes threatened to water, and I did not want to cry in front of everyone. This really made me feel stupid. So I did what I usually do when I have a problem. I prayed.
Lord, I need your help. I'm in the spotlight here, and have a lot of people looking for me to succeed. Please help me and all the class to pass the retest. Please take away my anger and my fear. Be with me, calm me down, and help me get through this.
As I continued to nibble at my lunch I continued to pray in my head. I looked down at the half-eaten sandwich, and suddenly pushed the center in toward me. The bread, crunchy peanut butter, and strawberry jelly became a friendly smile. I smiled in spite of myself and thought, "Boy I have really lost it now! My sandwich and I are grinning at each other! I'll probably be the first Section 8 discharge the GSDF has had to process!"
My moment of ridiculousness passed, and I went back to classes. I passed the retest and didn't stress over it so much. I received compliments from the class and the cadre about the job I was doing. When I got into bed Saturday night, I felt it had been a good day afterall.
Can you find God if you know where to look, and does He hear your prayers? You bet He does. He sent me a smile, and it was just what I needed!!!
posted by Jennifer at 1:03 AM
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